I Haven't Done My Report... Nevermind

Every Monday I'm extremely excited and motivated to go to work (internship period now) and keeps a smile on my face. I'll tell myself: I'll write report once I get home and after dinner then my progress would be steady. Once I get home, I watch some TV; check email; do other research that would not benefit my report such as Googling places of attraction in Palmerston North. By 9pm, it is dinner time for an hour. At 10pm, I will Skype with my boyfriend and pay as much attention to him possible as he is having a hard time coping with studies over there. It would be 11.30pm when we finish videocall and I would go to sleep thinking

Crap. I haven't done my report! Nevermind - there's still tomorrow.

Tuesday comes with a little Tuesday blues from using up most of the energy on the day before. On the way home during the bus ride, I remind myself to write report after watching Running Man. I came home at the usual time at 7pm and thought: there's some time to spare for workout! LET'S DO IT! So I spend half an hour to an hour working out with dumb bells on a yoga mat in my room. I usually stop working out when I hear the sounds of bicycle being pushed to the corridor and that indicates that Mom has returned home with dinner. Dinner starts at 8.30pm on "lucky" days, if not 9pm, then I'll eat while watching full episode of Running Man which takes up 1.5 hours. Skyping with my love on webcam is necessary every night and then when the clock strikes 11.30pm, I'll be like...

Crap. I haven't done my report! Nevermind - there's still tomorrow.

Midweek is the hardest to survive for most people but I enjoy it because of the weekly bazaar held at my workplace and I get to buy the avocado soymilk to go with my lunch! The avocado soymilk is my only motivation for midweek so I'm very thankful for the weekly bazaars even though the same stalls appear everytime. Since I came home on time, I might as well update my progress on the product development so far. Yes!, I thought to myself, finally some progress! But no updates done to my report because I would be distracted by dinner and concuss by 11.30pm from the drowsy concoction of cough syrup and cold medication.

Crap. I haven't done my report! Nevermind - there's still tomorrow.

Hear yay comes Thursday; one more day to end of hectic work week. Looking forward to Friday is my inspiration for Thursday. But you know, the same old happens when I get home. Probably some more progress on my actual report but not more than 4 paragraphs.

Crap. I haven't finished a section of my report! Nevermind - there's still tomorrow.

TGIF! I breeze through everything like how I did on Monday and I come back home to reward myself with long hours of TV and quality time Skyping with my love. I would then add: I should reward myself with more sleep since I have been working so hard despite being down with cold and cough. So I slept at 11pm.

Crap. I haven't done my report! Nevermind - there's still tomorrow.

Nevermind about weekends... I never touch the report anyway.

Realization Hits

A year from now, I would have graduated with a degree and secured a job at a local SME. Then I would have to start worrying about paying income tax, repayment of CPF tuition loan, giving allowance to my parents, saving money for myself, starting my dream and also having to save up for the future with my love. I would be debt-ridden - loan repayment, my dream, wedding, getting a house.

I wonder if it would be possible just to work for 4 to 5 years and be a boss of my own. I only can wonder so much...

Eatout at 49 Seats

My buddy of 10 years introduced this up-and-coming restaurant to me which is located at Kreta Ayer; a walkable distance from Outram Park MRT station from Exit H. It appears that the restaurant is called 49 Seats because it has exactly 49 seats in-house and if you had popped by when it's full house, well, too bad, you gotta sit outside and it's no longer like a real experience in 49 Seats!

Picture credits: hungrygowhere.com

It took us less than a minute to locate the signs and we made reservations beforehand, surprised that we could push forward reservations from 8pm to 7.15pm without any obligations from the staff. I'm not sure if the staff who served us is the boss or a normal staff because he is so fluent in talking and his accent sounded like some (okay I'm being very mean here) fashion stylist or, according to XL, her GP teacher. But you get what I mean? It's rare to find F&B crew with such fluency and professionalism like him and he does not have the Singaporean accent at all.

I researched beforehand that the tom yum seafood pasta ($14.90) and smoked duck pasta ($13.90)are the MUST-TRY foods. Without hesitation, I decided on the smoked duck pasta while XL got her tom yum seafood pasta so we could share. Her friend recommended cheese fries ($7.90)so she ordered it while I got one set of calamari rings ($9.90 for 10 pieces). To top it all off, we had apple ciders as the fruit beers ran out.

 As you can see that the lighting is not the best over there so I had overexposed the photos during editing - I can't tell apart my eyes and my eyeliner from the picture above. The atmosphere was rather lively because there is a family or two sitting behind us and a group of glamorously dressed young working adults sitting beside us. The staff were very attentive and foods were served in less than 20 minutes. In case you were wondering what brand of apple cider we had, it is called Somersby. XL said NTUC had offer on three bottles of apple cider but aiya... we pay for the atmosphere and not to come here and be aunties mah.

Sinful dinner after a tough week

Even for two starving girls, the calamari rings were below average and the cheese fries weren't as legendary as her friend had worshipped it to be - it tastes like KFC fries (crap I must stop making fast-food references). For my next visit, I would just order the pasta and try the dessert.

The tom yum seafood pasta was a tad spicy - maybe she added half a bottle of tabasco sauce when I ate it - and I don't think I can finish a plate. Thank goodness. It had a unique blend of tom yum and creaminess, much like a thick version of laksa soup base. The pasta wasn't as al dente but the sauce had compensated for it. Maybe when I'm on a spicy food binge I might try it.

My smoked duck pasta was daaaaaaaaa best! The consistency and cheesiness and milky flavour was just right and it didn't leave me satiated at all - well up to the last bite because I was rather bloated with the carbonation from apple cider. Although I would say I can prepare this dish as home with a cream base, spaghetti and frozen smoked duck from grocery store, I would come here because of the unique cream base they have. Therefore my conclusion is...

And a mandatory photo that XL requested so that she can let her friends know that she had visited 49 Seats.

Good place, good food worth the money and I'm hoping for a quieter ambience next time.

Directions to 49 Seats: Alight at Outram Park MRT station, head out of Exit H. Walk straight once you come up from the escalator, pass by Capitol Restaurant and Jean Yip Loft until you see Kreta Ayer Rd sign. Walk to the building opposite the indian temple and go to the left side of the building for 49 Seats.

Fried stuff makes me lousy

Just as I worked my ass off during the weekends for some intense abs exercise and felt really good about my diet for the past few weeks, I succumbed to the evil of treating myself with food. Fried chicken cutlet. That's how bad it is.

I always tell myself that "You don't reward yourselves with food because you are not a dog" but my craving for "rewards" seemed to override that message and 'lo and behold... I was queuing up at the snack stall waiting for the two piece Taiwan-country-shaped size fried chicken, cut into little bite size pieces and sprinkled with seasoning and peppers. These are the combinations an acne victim should not mess with because all these "heatiness" from the fried chicken and seasoning just flares up the skin and make pimples pop up just when you least want it.

Honestly, I have avoided this sinful item for three months so far and this is exactly how I feel right after finishing the whole bag:

• Lethargic
• Lousy
• Lazy
• Fat
• My workout yesterday had gone down the drain
• No more motivation

This is why for some people, eating fried stuff is a vicious cycle because they MUST have it to feel better. Then the effect wears off and the whole thing repeats again.

That's it man... I'm staying off these snacks and I would rather opt for papaya soy milkshake any time.

Oh. I just realized I wrote an entire post about fried chicken. Ha!

Mini Shopping Haul - Scape

A happy girl is a pretty girl! And yes, I am much happier after going on an impromptu shopping spree at Scape and Cineleisure when my original intention was to get a handphone case for Mom and one more for my friend. I ended up buying three more cases for my S3 because my favourite bumblebee yellow Mercury case had turned black on the sides whereas my turquoise Mercury case didn't... how odd. But still, who could resist $2 jelly cases with 10 colours?! I'm not a fan of hard cases because my belief is:

Once you drop your phone, your phone and your case buang (are gone case) together

Sunnies that I had wanted for so long

Bought this bug-eye sunnies with gold details at flea market stall set up by Statement Muse for ten bucks. I have wanted these bug-eye sunnies since I saw them at Bugis St but my dearest said I looked like a pedo when I wear the mirror-finish sunnies. It's a good thing he doesn't know who is Elton John, given his limited knowledge of famous musicians, thank goodness... if not I would be facing a sarcasm debate with my twin.

Can't believe there is a flea market stall selling flats

Buying shoes was the third on my list - I wanted sandals actually - but it moved up to second place when I saw a stall beside Statement Muse and there was a great variety of moccassin-like flats. Too bad that the seller didn't have my size for the design I liked, so I got this brown one inside. A good (temporary) buy for someone with wide foot!

Cheap cheap flats!

Being the ultimate "mountain turtle" I was at market rates of cupcakes, I realized how extravagant it was to spend $17 on half a dozen of cupcakes and over $30 on a dozen of cupcakes. As I was contemplating to buy cupcakes for snacks without realizing the price, my friend convinced me that getting donuts is better in terms of the amount of fats and sugar he perceived required to burn off and in terms of price. Good thinking! I was turned off immediately and kekanan pusing (made a right turn) to BreadTalk to get Hello Kitty donuts! Okay... both are equally unhealthy but my guilt is cut down by a whole lot from the absence of cream in the pastry. Hmm... except for the amount of trans fat present in baked products. Too much of nutrition knowledge from the previous paper is stopping me from eating many foods... *gasp*

Not a fan of HK but I'm a sucker for cute things like these

And not to forget my phone cases in beige, pink and yellow! The LINE camera seems to always take pictures that makes my complexion look ultra smooth, or is it that true that happy girls are pretty girls?

More phone covers!

Day 0

As soon as I told my friends that I'll be spending my weekends drawing circles on the floor because 大肥 is going away for a semester at Taiwan, they probe me with questions like

"Are you going to be sad?"

"Would you cry?"

"How do you feel?"

I gave a politically, yet expected and honest answer to them,

"I will be sad and bawl when he has to leave. We trust each other and I know that he can take care of himself and what's left to be sad is that I can only see him, talk to him but not hold him like every time."

I didn't cry as much as I would like 'cos he was rushing to meet his friends at transit area... but I did shed quite a few tears and didn't wanna let him go. For now, the closest item I can get to hugging him is to combine two warm bolsters, a burping machine that emits trash-like stench and a Snorlax face.

He is on the plane now and about to take off and I know he probably won't read my blog, given that his brain always shut down whenever he sees wordy posts and "bombastic" English that he is lazy to comprehend. I told him that I'm more worried for the weather he will encounter over there because it is unpredictable and I shan't go on talking about those 不吉利的话.

He told me to write crosses to countdown the weeks left to meet him like how prisoners cross out the number of days they had spent in their cells. This countdown is more agonizing than a one-minute countdown from the microwave by 3428798372 times.

As of now...

146 days to go.

Vocabulary Terror

Bf: My friend says I look like Kang Gary (from Running Man) when I wear the cap and have my eyes half closed

Me: Really?

Bf: Yeah. And I was like "Aiya, don't flatten me la!"

*pause*

Me: You mean flatter?

Bf: Um... yeah

Me: Well if your face was flattened you sure look like him!

Victor's Kitchen & Kooka Cafe

After learning our lesson from last time (greeted by 10% of the total menu when we visited Victor's Kitchen at 3.30pm on a weekday), we decided to reach there as early as we can. We reached at 11am which was quite a close shave before the lunch crowd comes in at 11.45am. I didn't take any photos cos I was busy eating from the giddy bus ride and an empty stomach - I cannot take long bus rides without proper breakfast. 

By the time we got there, 40% of the full menu was cancelled out so it was better than last time. We ordered minced meat porridge with dried vegetables, siew mai, har gao, deep fried prawn dumpling, fried beancurd skin wrapped with prawns, hot chrysanthemun tea and HK iced tea. The names which are bolded are the yummy ones. 

The porridge was a little more watery than I had expected for a Cantonese chok... something like a crossover between Teochew porridge and Cantonese chok. It is good in a way that I still have space for other foods served later. As compared to a Cantonese chok, the one opposite my house, it has a clean aftertaste and doesn't stick onto the mouth like a sticky porridge would. A sticky porridge tends to make me thirsty - maybe the MSG? - and I'll end up full by water. Overall, the porridge is a good "base" to go along with the heavy dimsums. 

I didn't like the siew mai and fried beancurd skin wrapped with prawns because there is this "pork taste" that leaves me jelak and turned off after a while. I love the har gao and deep fried prawn dumpling (or wanton) cos it is so full with prawns and filled with a lot less pork than the two dishes I mentioned earlier. Don't expect the fried dumplings to be half of your palm size because less is more and you savour it... not gobble it! Chrysanthemun tea is alright and I haven't got to drink HK iced tea cos I was busy eating.

Directions to Victor's Kitchen: Take 147 (leaving Hougang Bus Interchange) and sit and relax until you see Hotel Ibis Bencoolen, alight at the stop when the bus turns to the right to alight at Sunshine Plaza. If you are reaching there by foot, locate Hotel Ibis and you will see Sunshine Plaza. 

From Victor's Kitchen, my trusty Google Map led me to Kooka Cafe along Purvis Street. It took us a 15 minute walk to locate it and to digest our oily brunch. Kooka cafe is a relaxing, dim-litted cafe that serves light brunch, pastries and coffee. The cutleries and iced water are self-service and they sell art pieces that are hung on the walls. 

I ordered Pear & Almond Tart and Long Black while Xiaoli ordered Blueberry Cheesecake (MUST TRY) and Homemade Iced Tea.

Blueberry Cheesecake and Homemade Iced Tea. Credits to Xiao Li

Blueberry Cheesecake was light and its accompaniment of blueberries just pop in your mouth! Have it with some fresh cream and it tastes so amazing. I could have this all by myself and not feel sick at all.

Pear & Almond Tart

For your coming visit to Kooka Cafe, if you had a heavy lunch or not, you must try the Pear & Almond Tart. It is light and not diabetically-sweet. Just remember to eat with the fresh cream SPARINGLY otherwise you will start missing them :(

Long Black on top right corner with delicious Lemon Biscuit

I have never loved fresh cream so much before.

Trial Run for Party Makeup

My makeup skills hadn't been improving lately and I thought it was time to learn to do a proper makeup for my party. I learned from this YouTuber, frmheadtotoe, as she has monolids and slight hooded lids like mine.



I skipped the mascara and false eyelashes because I was left with a mascara I got 2 years ago and falsies just irritate the tear out of my eyes. I can't stop blinking and tearing up without feeling like there's a toothpick poking my eyelids!

Armed with my 88 neutral colour eyeshadow palette, I believed that I could get any similar colours as she had used in her Urban Decay Naked Palette. After a painful 30 minute, I realize that only the dark shimmery brown colour wasn't available in the set and I had to use the Maybelline Eyestudio eyeshadows in Autumn Spirit. 

Close enough!

This was the closest I could get. It was easier to do the left side as the eyelids were considered to be double eyelids but they are the not obvious type. The right eyelids are completely hooded lids so both eyes would end up with eyeliners of different thickness.

Downside was that my desk light is yellow coloured so the eyeshadows end up looking a little darker than it would have been in the video.

Oh well, good job Hui Yi! :)

Removing A Lizard

As literal as the title sounds, I'm gonna pen down my stupid behaviour of removing a house lizard - which is pretty well-nourished from its size - using a plastic container and an umbrella.

Usually lizards are rarely bold enough to come into a wide living area as they hide behind TV cabinets and the corner of cupboards, but then this long-time resident appeared near the feng shui fountain at my house and when I moved the nearby containers, it flinched but didn't run away! I thought it was weird, so I went back to have my brunch and watched "13 Going On 30" until 12.30pm.

I went back to check and it was still there at the same spot where it got frightened by me. I took an umbrella and used the tip to hit on the floor, hoping the sound would scare it and it will go back to hide. It still didn't respond... so I used a container to trap it and use the umbrella to push it out of my house and to the corridors (and kept muttering "Sorry!" when its rubbery limbs got caught under the container as I dragged it across the cement floor).

Imagine your neighbour using an umbrella to push a plastic container cautiously at the corridors... wouldn't you think she is mental? Yeah, that's what I thought when my neighbour left her house with her grandson and I just left the container right beside a drain... just in case I look like a crazy person.

I hope the lizard is alright though.

Y U NO THIS?

I thought it was a fun post to do after reading on my cousin's blog, so I shall do one myself!

I had been stuffed a durian into my mouth when I was young - don't like being forced to eat something unknown and don't like the taste of that unknown. The flesh tasted mushy, fibre-y, vomit-ish... just every undesirable sensory descriptors characterised into one fruit known as King of the Fruits. Ugh, how can they even say that? I have given this King another chance by eating durian puff when I was in primary school, then it was, like, thanks but no thanks. The texture and taste is still all wrong. I think durian is the only fruit that has more bad health effects than any other fruits?

I don't like the feeling of getting squished/grinded by random people/pervy dudes feeling up my bottom/getting sweaty and trading beads of sweat with the people around me. In fact, my first experience in a club-like place is the mosh pit during Paramore concert. Sure, I was excited that Alex paid for Dennis and me for $98 standing pen tickets to get close to Paramore. But when the opening band departed, the mosh pit squeezed from 3/4 of mosh pit to half of the pit; imagine that. I was being pushed 2-3m away from Dennis and Alex was (happily) being pushed to a far corner near the stage by the crowd. Imagine my delight when I found Dennis standing at the empty area back of the crowd, where I can get aircon and not being pushed around during "Ignorance". With that, I conclude why I don't go to clubs.

Stop saying I am skinny, I am normal sized! In fact, I am putting on weight - not to be bragging - but the fatty areas are not seen 'cos they are all at my tummy. Put me on the weighing scale and see how much I weigh and you will be shocked. I get comments like "You look 45kg!" or "You look like 50kg!". Puh-leese, I weigh a stone more than that alright! I can see my weight jumping 2kg by 2kg as my jeans size increase with an additional muffin top. Gosh, I hate muffin tops!

People find drinking alcohol is to savour while chatting with friends, having a good time. But my life objective about food is that once it is placed in front of me, my mission is to finish it. After finishing, I would have to focus on chatting with my friends. So I don't find drinking alcohol to be cool at all, especially the vomiting and disorientation as your friends carry you to walk. It's not cool at all. Yes, I have a limit because I don't want to reek of alcohol. In fact, I drink on rare occasions, like barbecue and celebratory events or night out with friends, but it's just a cup and that's all. Nothing more than that because I don't like red face + bloodshot eyes + disorientation. Thank you

When there's a perfectly good reason to dress nice to school such as friend's birthday dinner after school, I will wear nicely. If I am in the best of mood, I will wear nicely. Other than that, I will dress in Threadless t-shirt, berms or shorts, slippers and my denim Zara bag. My Mom says I look like I'm heading to the factory to work, but what's there to flaunt about in school? I gotta admit that when I dress nice to school, I don't feel comfortable because I have to wear the outfit WHOLE DAY. By the time school ends, my make-up would have melted; I would have been pespiring; my perfume would have been diminished; hence I would have to go through the trouble of bringing all these stuff to replenish what I have lost, before heading to meet my friends.

New Weaknesses

Scrapbooking papers are my new weakness.

I passed by a scrapbooking stall at flea market today and all I saw was "OMG Buy 5 get 1 free" and I contemplated a while... until my boy saw that look on my face and he egged me to take my time to choose the designs I want while he patiently waits beside me to collect the pieces I have chosen.

Oh gosh, how much I love him.

The worst part of liking scrapbooking papers are that I love both sides of the paper and want to use both full areas but I can't bear to bring myself to... so I have to buy two copies. But heh! Who cares, the more papers I collect, the happier I am~

Another weakness I discovered is Marche bakery items. The foods are so big and fluffy and yummy and filling and heavenly! But I always missed out the donuts with fillings :( Who cares, as long as I have my apple and raisin snail buns and donuts coated with icing, I'm a happy kid!

Four Minutes of Calm

Two Decades Old

Often I've been part of the crowd that does surprises and love to see the reaction of birthday guy or girl when we pop out of the blue and shout "Happy birthday!". Yesterday it was my turn to be the birthday girl and boy, I almost though the surprise and the big group of people seated together were the friends of a couple walking ahead of us up the staircase.

So my day started out by meeting 大肥 at White Sands as I was lugging a big bag of clothes to change for staying over. Something tells me it isn't normal to see him hiding his right hand behind his back... I thought, hmm maybe another gold wire bookmark or a birthday card? But nope, he fished out a small bouquet of yellow and orange tinted tulips and smiled from ear to ear.

I believe my reaction was rather underwhelming cos I choked out "Wow... okay" as I took over the bouquet. I mean, don't blame me, I'm not a fan of receiving flowers everyday like how guys believe girls would like. Yes, receiving flowers are very sweet because not many people does this nowadays and can you believe the price of a small bouquet these days? I'd rather my boy spend his money on something more practical (like feeding my tummy... muahahaha!) but the thought of him spending a little fortune to get a classic bouquet is heart-warming. I had to comfort him repeatedly due to my underwhelmed response.

He told me that when he asked the florist for tulips to be given to me, the florist replied,

"Boy, buy rose la! Cheaper and romantic. Tulips (are) expensive you know."

But he went ahead with my favourite tulips. Don't hate on me but I feel roses are over-rated - I rather get something like tulips or sunflowers (those singular ones with a big stalk). We had Pepper Lunch for brunch (yes... despite my cough) and I was reminded by him to carry this bouquet wherever I go. Then we went back to settle down at his house and lazed around to watch TV until it was time to wash up and get ready to celebrate my birthday by having dinner at The Loft!

Gigantic phone which has all of his attention

Yes! Unglam/fatty shot!

Fattest period of our lives

Honestly I wasn't expecting much for my birthday every year because it feels like passing another day and I don't feel like there is a spotlight shining on me wherever I go. Birthdays are special days whereby I could treat myself by retail therapy and indulge in sinful foods despite my weak immune system. So I thought, hey, my boyfriend had made plans to eat at this posh-looking place and spending my special day with him at his house cuddling and being cosy doesn't seem so bad afterall.

I asked if he had made reservations and he said the place isn't packed so there is no need for reservations, then again I thought "hmm why wouldn't a restaurant be packed on a Saturday and considering it is located at an atas area?". Anyway, my suspicions were quickly erased once I walked up the stairs and heard a loud

HAPPY BIRTHDAY TO YOU~

I got shocked for a moment and thought it was for the couple walking in front of us... until I saw Cheryl's wide grin. And~ as usual I teared up a little and was so glad that all of them are here. We quickly placed our orders and halfway through the dinner, Sophia and Cheryl felt their food was undercooked... it was either too mushy or the pasta wasn't as al dente was expected. In overall I'd say the pork rack, fish & chips and mushroom tarts were the better ones in the menu.

Pork Rack

Grilled Chicken

Bitchy eye-roll

As we finished the dinner, Soph and Cheryl said they had to go to the toilet and left the table. After I went to the toilet I realize "Eh... didn't they say they went to the toilet but it seems like there's only one cubicle here?" I gave them the benefit of doubt that there were more toilets downstairs...

And they came up the stairs with mixed berries tart from Fruit Paradise as my birthday "cake"!

Love you guys! :*

Thank you guys for the amazing surprise and company! I treasure our friendship from the past 7 years and I know you all will be my lifelong and crazy and hyper friends :) Additionally I'm glad that Adin was roped into this birthday dinner.

To my dear who had been tolerating my nonsensical temper and always-starving tummy, 辛苦你了！You would never expect a girl at my size to have such a big appetite and you've spoiled me for good. I like that we are approaching the end of the year because the next event we are celebrating is our anniversary and your birthday. Also, you are so good as keeping my suspicions at bay while you carry out the surprise with them (you even told them I like Fruit Paradise!). Or am I just too blur to notice? Well... at least I am not paranoid!

Directions to The Loft @ Katong: It is located behind Roxy Square and next to 328 Katong Laksa

Call Center Nightmare

Count myself "lucky" to encounter two dispute calls since the start of my work 2 weeks ago. I must have been so heng to get these type of calls because they put my reasoning skills to the test and stretch my tolerance for such unreasonable customer.

So one lady called in today and I guess the only way she speaks on the phone is to yell, shout, holler, scream, whatever you can think of. She made an enquiry and a request that I could not attend to because it doesn't fit the purpose of calling this hotline and it is not my responsibility to entertain such calls, but I attended to her request out of goodwill. Yes, goodwill can kill - and I got "killed" by the customer today all because of the little angel floating at the top of my head urging me to do something nice for her.

I did whatever I could to help the lady and all she said were,

"You don't understand what I'm saying!"

"Are you stupid or what?"

"You are not answering my question!"

Tell me how to not blow my top when she only converse by shouting? Fine, I kept my cool for the first 10 minutes of the verbally and emotionally abusive call. She even asked a very stupid question like,

"How come the country code of Hong Kong is 852 - 3 digits - while Singapore one is 65 - 2 digits?"

How the fuck would I know lady? I am not the head of whichever big company that decides the country code and decides how many digits would be in the country code! So I tolerated her a while more and replied her politely that I would not know the reason for this as it had already been determined like many many years ago. 

After tolerating her nonsense and screams for the past 15 minutes for something stupid - like how I didn't read the number in one go (I mean, hey, I read out the number slowly to you to make sure that you get every damn number correct so you cannot have another chance to scold me!), I broke into sobs and it could be heard over the ultra-sensitive microphone attached to my headset. The lady apologized to me and used her age as an excuse ("I'm 55 years old and still have to work at this age. You are, what, 20 years old? I wish I was at your age working so it wouldn't be tiring"). She asked for my name and an email address that she can reach somebody because she wants to do this...

A commendation letter.

Seriously ma'am? I don't need your fucking commendation letter for all the emotional and verbal abuse you had put me through for the past 20 minutes of phone call. I know some people find 20 minutes is not long enough to count blowing your top and break into sobs but imagine a random old aunty approaches you in the MRT and start to yell at you for something you didn't do wrong... wouldn't you be furious?

I told her straight off my chest - even though I knew every call was recorded for audit purposes - that I don't want her commendation letter. Deep inside, the damage had already been done, period. I am already inconsolable and I haven't sobbed quite badly since the last time I cried at my aunty's funeral. Yeah, that's how bad my work day was during noon time. She apologized repeatedly for upsetting me and mentioned that I am "young and brave girl that could put up with her because she was so busy that she couldn't spare time to look up the company'c contact number herself". While she explained for her abusive behaviour, I would never bring myself to accept her apology by answering her. 

Now I know how verbal abuse can destroy a person emotionally and how "sorry no cure" feels like. It is like slowly hacking a tree with each abusive word and to only apologize to the tree when it topples down with no more support from the root.

Nobody should ever be a victim of verbal abuse for something that they had not done wrong because everyone must be given the same amount of respect.

Chasing or Giving Up My Dream

Two key elements you should keep in mind while reading: money and the *cough* country. These two are deciding factors who would affect me taking up a degree that I have no interest in (but still able to get a decent job to survive in THIS country), or encourage me to chase my dream goal of becoming a dietician.

We all know money makes the world go round, and this particularly applies to insanely rich teens who didn't get ideal grades to make it to local universities but able to enter universities out of Singapore. I have two friends who are going to Australia for their studies and obviously I am very happy for them, in terms that they would be able to study what they like and with passion to study getting a degree certificate won't be taxing. I know that time and time again I have been ranting continuously about how lack of money won't get my studies any further, but I still want to stress the fact that teens with average grades coming from a middle-class family won't be able to afford the overseas tuition fees... let alone the living costs!

The most (I wouldn't say "secure") "common" degrees that would probably guarantee a job for me in the harsh society would be education - that is confirmed employment but also a "last resort" to some people - human resource, business administration, tourism and nursing. The latter is a type of job that usually people, locally, look down as nurses give locals the impression that they clean up patients and serve food and tolerate all the nasty stuff coming from the patient. Most importantly, nurses are one of the few frontliners when facing an outbreak, especially the SARS outbreak, which they were very brave to put up with. This is the reason why you don't see many local nurses as their job scope are generalized into "cleaning up, face health risks, and abused by patients". So when would Singapore change the impression of nurses to those as heroic as doctors?

Getting a job in the business and tourism industry is easy, except that one has to be particularly outstanding and able to think on their feet to secure a place in the company. As a science student for the past 3 years, I have no clue on what business industry is about... however I feel that I am going to venture into human resource management due to the lack of funding for my dream degree and the unpaved road for my journey to become a dietician.

With that being said, there are two and only two ways in getting a chance to study a degree overseas: have filthy rich ancestors or parents, or being super smart and getting a scholarship.

I belong to neither category and I'm stuck in this country.

Good day.

Twisted Mind

For the past 5 years I had been a fan of sadistic, psychotic and twisted novels that my friends find it repulsive; like "Perfume", "Devil's Bones" and "Fifty Shades of Grey". They would go,

"How do you read this stuff!" or "Why do you find it interesting when it is so twisted?"

I don't know, really... I just got attracted to the plot and the mind of the character. Or perhaps it was due to my Chinese teacher who introduced "Perfume" to the class during my secondary school days that caught my attention to this genre of books/movies.

Another category of books that I love are those that involve terminal illness or any sympathetic situation that the main character lands in, like "Sister's Keeper" and "Handle With Care" and Kim Edward's "The Memory Keeper's Daughter". A few favourites from another seemingly "safe" category of books would be "Five People You Meet In Heaven" and "Dear John"... so I guess I am still a normal human being?

But where would the fun be if I were to be stereotyped as "sicko" by reading these psychotic books, in which these events would never ever happen in real life? I don't know if liking these genre of books mean that I have an inclination to be a sadist or psycho or plainly love to see tragedies (by the way I also like to read books related to war and how people managed to survive the harsh camps).

I need some personality evaluation!

Beyond Superficial Expectations

Sexiness wears thin after a while and beauty fades, but to be married to a man who makes you laugh every day, ah, now that’s a real treat…

In Other Words...

From my experience in the past few job interviews, I came across some commonly used phrases that could have a crude and sarcastic meaning to it. So I shall start with the phrase that I heard and what I intepret.

Unleash your creativity in our shop

What I interpret: Contribute your ideas and boss earns the recognition while no pay increment for you.

Involved in production and having your say

"BKL" (bao kao liao - means you do everything even if it is out of your job scope)

Yes, we will definitely recruit you however you would start work in 3 months time

You may just wait and wait and end up with nothing, sucker!

We want to get the word out for our shop

Wants you to help them advertise for free

Besides this, there are also phrases commonly used by women that drives their man crazy, like...

I'm okay

A mild red light is flashing, so beware to ask further or keep your mouth shut because it could mean "Yeah, I'm okay. I would not think about what happened now... but maybe before I go to sleep/on the way to work/when I have time to myself and I would end up being paranoid."

I'm fine

Well this depends on the English standards that women are used to communicate with you; some people say "okay" often than "fine" and both have the same weight in meaning. However, in this case that "I'm okay" is used, "I'm fine" refers to the glaring fire engine or police cars flashing on the streets. Once she uses this phrase and you ask further, she would reply "Fine? You'd really believe I am fine with that? No, I'm not fine with it at all! Your attitude just now was horrible... I took so much time to prepare the dinner and yet you come home and said you had eaten when I told you I'd be cooking!"

Whatever

Seriously... that's stupid.

Ugh... I'm not gonna eat that; I'm on a diet

Depending on the personality of the woman - if she is headstrong then don't give her that food, but if she is one that wavers easily then just go ahead. It would usually mean "Would you spare me some fries? It would not have much effect on my weight cos I can burn it off while shopping."

Oh God she's such a bitch

It really means "I'm envious of her looks/her social circle/etc" when you see her exaggerated expression while saying this phrase. But if she looks slightly disgusted when saying that, she really hates the person but had gotten over the time when she used to spend energy to hate on them (e.g. gossip about their latest Facebook statuses, criticizing whatever they say)

How To Love A Woman

“You may not be her first, her last, or her only. She loved before she may love again. But if she loves you now, what else matters? She’s not perfect - you aren’t either, and the two of you may never be perfect together but if she can make you laugh, cause you to think twice, and admit to being human and making mistakes, hold onto her and give her the most you can. She may not be thinking about you every second of the day, but she will give you a part of her that she knows you can break - her heart. So don’t hurt her, don’t change her, don’t analyze and don’t expect more than she can give. Smile when she makes you happy, let her know when she makes you mad, and miss her when she’s not there.”

- Bob Marley